You think your life is set.
You’ve been married for decades.
Then suddenly, everything changes.
That’s what gray divorce feels like. It hits later in life, often without warning. And for many people, it’s not just about losing a relationship. It’s about losing a sense of who you are.
What makes it harder? Most people don’t talk about it. So you feel alone.
That’s why sharing stories matters so much as Beyond Member of the Club and Substack Notes Bootcamper (👉🏻👉🏻grab one of the 19 spots left, join with KRISTINAFRIEND👈🏻👈🏻) Tamara Monosoff, Ed.D. does.
When one person opens up, others realize they’re not the only ones going through it. And slowly, a community forms.
From money struggles to dating again, coconut oil, there’s a lot to figure out. But you don’t have to do it alone.
Sometimes, healing starts with one honest story.
Gray divorce is rising after 50. Learn how to heal, rebuild your life, and find support through shared stories with Tamara Monosoff, Ed.D.’s new community called She’s Not Done Yet1.
Why building a community is so important in 2026
If you’ve been following me, you might remember my story “The Internet is Dead”.
AI-generated content has now quietly surpassed human written content online and wrote more than humans in 2025. Human content now has been buried under an AI (slop) tsumani.
I remember my conversation with psychoterhapist Patricia Ross, we met on Medium, in 2021. She told me during our Bootcamp:
“Kristina, people are longing for a deeper connection. You’re filling this void.”
I’ve been writing on the internet since December 2020, I see clearly: we are wired to live in groups. Modern life removed that. Online communities fill the gap.
Even if people say they want “content”, what they really want is connection.
The 3 core benefits of communities in 2026
First off, I think content (me for instance with this inspiring post) helps transformation. But connection and identity create stickiness.
What do I mean by this?
#1 Connection
Feeling seen and understood
Talking to people like you
Not being alone in your journey
#2 Transformation
Moving from point A → point B
Example: unproductive → productive
This is the main promise you sell
#3 Identity
“This is who I am now”
Like gray divorce or midlife women
The community becomes part of their identity
How to build a great community in 2026
Focus on ONE big promise, e.g. “Women going through a gray divorce don’t have to feel alone!”
People join many communities. Be the 1–2 communities they never leave by creating a category newsletter which foundation is your beating heart, sould and life experiences.
The first experience is everything. So when someone joines Tamara’s newsletter, excitement = high but also anxiety = high. So Tamara guides them step by step, tells them exactly what to do next, e.g. joining her live next week, and make them feel welcomed.
Start simple. Expand later. For Tamara this means she’s slwoly building her newsletter of long form essayas and her community through lives, chat and comments. She’s also getting lots of emails and DMs as it’s a sentitive topic.
What’s important for me and what I tell my bootcampers and coaching clients when we build a community around their core topic:
Community = A wonderful tool that helps people achieve a transformation through connection and shared experience
👇🏻👇🏻Meet Tamara inside this year’s Notes Bootcamp for people 50plus or in midlife👇🏻👇🏻
Here’s the email Tamara just sent me:
As an American midlife woman living in Portugal, she’s one of 30 bootcampers from around the world that already joined this year’s Substack Notes Kickstarter Bootcamp with Bootcamp grad and pychotherapist 70-plus Ellen Scherr and bestselling author and 65-year old Viral Notes Writer Karen Salmansohn.
So you’ll never feel alone again, especially as a writer 50plus, and master short form writing in a group of beautiful humans.
Ellen, Karen and myself had our rehearsal today and can’t wait to open the doors on April 7!
3 days left to join us.
Join with
KRISTINAFRIEND
Thank you Melinda Blau, Ron Smit, and many others for tuning into my live video with Tamara Monosoff, Ed.D.!
