Here’s what’s coming up for me: relatability. It’s something I explore in my Substack often, and it’s so closely tied to vulnerability. The idea that we’re supposed to write in a way that’s ‘relatable’ - and just vulnerable ‘enough’ - it’s got old, fast.
Here’s what’s coming up for me: relatability. It’s something I explore in my Substack often, and it’s so closely tied to vulnerability. The idea that we’re supposed to write in a way that’s ‘relatable’ - and just vulnerable ‘enough’ - it’s got old, fast.
Think about neurodiversity. How does someone with a neurodivergent mind approach writing for an audience? And no, I’m not saying neurodivergent people are all the same - that would be ridiculous and offensive. But what about my tween 2E daughter, for example? She’s got her own Substack. She’s navigating her voice in a space that’s mostly adults. Is she supposed to shape-shift into something that pleases others, or can she just be her full, messy self?
Here’s the bottom line: when we put guardrails around how we ‘should’ write to fit in, without addressing the bigger, systemic issues - like the ones that exclude certain voices- we’re leaving out something important.
The real work, the kind that changes us, the kind that brings us closer to truth, comes from people showing up as they are. Not bending to fit. Leaning into discomfort. It’s often not ‘relatable.’ It’s raw, it’s real, and it goes all the way to the bone.
Agreed, Danusia, and thanks for your comments. The funny thing is that when we are raw and real, we often are relatable – not to *everyone*, as you've pointed out, but to the people who need to feel seen. I agree with you that trying to be relatable can work against you. I find just being authentic tends to make me relatable to some of my readers. I gave up trying to fit in years ago ;)
Thank you for this article, Trudie and Kristina.
Here’s what’s coming up for me: relatability. It’s something I explore in my Substack often, and it’s so closely tied to vulnerability. The idea that we’re supposed to write in a way that’s ‘relatable’ - and just vulnerable ‘enough’ - it’s got old, fast.
Think about neurodiversity. How does someone with a neurodivergent mind approach writing for an audience? And no, I’m not saying neurodivergent people are all the same - that would be ridiculous and offensive. But what about my tween 2E daughter, for example? She’s got her own Substack. She’s navigating her voice in a space that’s mostly adults. Is she supposed to shape-shift into something that pleases others, or can she just be her full, messy self?
Here’s the bottom line: when we put guardrails around how we ‘should’ write to fit in, without addressing the bigger, systemic issues - like the ones that exclude certain voices- we’re leaving out something important.
The real work, the kind that changes us, the kind that brings us closer to truth, comes from people showing up as they are. Not bending to fit. Leaning into discomfort. It’s often not ‘relatable.’ It’s raw, it’s real, and it goes all the way to the bone.
Agreed, Danusia, and thanks for your comments. The funny thing is that when we are raw and real, we often are relatable – not to *everyone*, as you've pointed out, but to the people who need to feel seen. I agree with you that trying to be relatable can work against you. I find just being authentic tends to make me relatable to some of my readers. I gave up trying to fit in years ago ;)